Thursday, September 1, 2011

Comfortable In Your Own Skin

"You know her - She is that friend who always looks fabulous. And it's not only the colors she wears or the mix of patterns that just works or the necklace that no one else you know can pull off. what she really has is something you can't get at the mall - confidence. She's strong, she's sexy, and she buys only what she loves. Simply put, she looks good because she feels good. And you can channel her style with a little help from fall's best new clothes."

This was an add in the Ladies Home Journal. What does it say to you? This is what it says to me: "Look at her, she's perfect. You wish you could be her but you can't. She's better than you will ever be and you know it. But spend some money and we will try to help you look like her because addressing your level of confidence and how you feel about yourself is a waste of time. Let us help you pretend to be someone else so that no one can tell on the inside you are miserable. But whatever you do... don't just try to be yourself!"

I mean really! First of all clothes do not make the woman. They may make the man because there isn't much else he can do with himself ( I know, cheap shot) but they do not make the woman. The initial description of the woman is wonderful. She chooses who she is and because she feels good it radiates to others. But why in the world would a women's magazine tell us that we can't be this too?!

Being comfortable in your own skin is something that I don't even think some people understand. It is exactly why these kinds of ads exist. Because there are people out there that don't understand why anyone would just want to be, dress, choose what they like for themselves! We should all want to be someone else. It's infuriating actually.  It's telling us not to like who we are, but to like that girl over there and who she is better, because THAT is the way to make yourself feel good. Are you kidding me?? I personally do have a strong opinion about how I want to look and it does make me feel a certain way when I do or don't accomplish it. But then I see those women that appear not to care at all, they are earthy as can be, for lack of a better description, and the confidence they exude is amazing. And I find them beautiful though I think I could never pull off that look without just looking dirty. So it's obviously not the look at all. Arthur Rubenstein said "I have found that if you love life, it loves you back. It's all about attitude." So how do you love life? Love yourself!

Now I am not saying that I am this person everyday. It's hard to feel strong and confident all the time. I fight it everyday! BUT I will not let a magazine that claims to be the best advice for women tell me that I cannot be strong and confident but it will gladly help me dress like the woman that is!

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