Tomorrow is Valentine's Day... I think I'll wrap myself up in a big red bow and shove myself into my mailbox. If I'm going to belong to anyone this year it is going to be me.
But who came up with this terrible idea anyway? I guess I should check into that before I talk it down, give me a minute...
According to Wikipedia Saint Valentine's Day was originally a day to honor martyred Christians. Really? So how did it get turned into a day of red hearts, balloons, candy, and a general bad feeling about ourselves? In fact: St. Valentine's head was actually preserved and kept at the abby of New Minster in Winchester to be honored. Am I missing the connection? Blood and Guts and Big Red Heart shaped boxes of chocolate?
Now I'm sure you are going to read this, and if you've read anything else I've written it will be easy to decide that I'm bitter about being single so I am completely dismissing Valentine's day as an evil holiday because the only card I will get is from my mother. Please follow my train of thought before you make your decision. Yes I will admit, if someone brought me roses or diamonds on February 14th year after year I would look forward to that day. As I would on March 14th or April 14th or May 14th. You get the point, right? But who decided that there should be just this one day where out loud and in public people should profess their undying love to you in a grandiose and expensive manner starting in about the 4th grade? And if it didn't happen to you then, you were crushed! They should rename it the "St. Self Esteem Crusher for all not so perfect little girls" day. Or how about, "I really liked you until I realized you couldn't buy me something cool now I'm gonna tell all the girls you're a loser" day. Or last but not least, "We were having fun, but I don't want to get you anything so I'm going to break up with you and then call you with regret in mid March" day. It just seems to me that if you love someone, you should show it when you feel it, not when everyone is watching to see how well you show it and how big or shiny it is.
And back to the history of it all. Apparently the Valentines were martyrs for Christianity, killed for their faith by the Roman pagan rulers. And in years to come Chaucer and Shakespeare used St. Valentine's day as a special day of love for their writing. Well at least I think that's what happened, but honestly I couldn't tell you what Chaucer was trying to say, the only reason I was able to get Valentine's out of it was because of the capital letter V. Who reads that gibberish? But I guess my lack of respect for English Literature isn't really the point here. The point is these guys were the precursors to the Hallmark family. They made it up. It means nothing. Like National Doctor's day, March 30th. What?? Do you send your doctor a gift? Flowers? How about a card that says "I'm glad my daughter's tonsillectomy was just enough to buy you that new Mercedes. When we were done paying the bill, we couldn't afford the ice cream we promised her".
I'm not saying I'm against holidays, but they should be real. And if they aren't they should be like National Fried Chicken day, something that almost anyone has the off chance of being able to enjoy. Not something that is bound to at one point in your life or another make you sit alone in a dark room with a gallon of ice cream wondering why you didn't get those flowers from that secret admirer that you know exists somewhere in commercial, flower candy, and jewelry ridden fantasy land!
Monday, February 13, 2012
Monday, January 16, 2012
Humanity ~
I read an interview today with a man that spent time with Dr. King. His name was Grady Butler and he said, "King's impact transcended race...
Humanity was his concern. He just happened to be an African-American. He just wanted to serve humanity and help somebody, and I think that was his legacy."
I copy these quotes because it is true. Our own need for kindness, to give or receive, means very little if we do not concern ourselves with the need of a much greater kindness in the world today. Dr. King understood this at a level that most of us do not.
In his day he was fighting a battle of black and white so it seemed, but what he had to say transcends to a much larger picture now. If we do not quickly change our thoughts from government and finance to kindness and humanity we will fall, just as the Greeks and Romans did. We must look outward. Our ideas of the Christian nation are only valid if we live to love our Muslim brothers. Our desire to keep our nation free is only just if we allow those that want to join our nation to be free when they arrive. The forefathers of this nation came here for religious freedom yet we have never truly respected that "freedom". We came to the America's to be free yet we took our nation from its existing inhabitants, and brought slaves to help us build the country into the "Land of the Free". And now we make our President spend the first 2 years of his presidency proving he is an American citizen because he doesn't come in a light skinned package. Companies add to their millions by sponsoring reality shows like "Teenage Moms","Mob Wives", "Housewives of Beverly Hills", and "Jersey Shore" but they pull out of "Muslim Nation". I know which group of people I want as neighbors, and if you and I disagree I don't want you as a neighbor either. I mean really, if you choose Snooky over a family that loves each other, contributes to society, and takes care of themselves just because they are Muslim, I truly have no use for you.
"Common sense is the genius of humanity."
~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
I have worked on kindness in my own life. I have allowed people in that I would not have chosen, I have continued to love a family that I can no longer call mine. I have put my own pain aside so that my children will feel and see love. I see kindness in those around me. My mother has never taken more than she gives and never asks for anything. I have friends that do things for others that can make me smile and feel warmth just by knowing how they have spent their day. But our work toward humanity needs to be so much more.
the quality of being humane; kindness; benevolence.
I've thought so much about kindness over the last year and what it means to me, but a bigger question is what does it mean to the world.
I think of this today, on Martin Luther King, Jr. day.
Humanity was his concern. He just happened to be an African-American. He just wanted to serve humanity and help somebody, and I think that was his legacy."
I copy these quotes because it is true. Our own need for kindness, to give or receive, means very little if we do not concern ourselves with the need of a much greater kindness in the world today. Dr. King understood this at a level that most of us do not.
In his day he was fighting a battle of black and white so it seemed, but what he had to say transcends to a much larger picture now. If we do not quickly change our thoughts from government and finance to kindness and humanity we will fall, just as the Greeks and Romans did. We must look outward. Our ideas of the Christian nation are only valid if we live to love our Muslim brothers. Our desire to keep our nation free is only just if we allow those that want to join our nation to be free when they arrive. The forefathers of this nation came here for religious freedom yet we have never truly respected that "freedom". We came to the America's to be free yet we took our nation from its existing inhabitants, and brought slaves to help us build the country into the "Land of the Free". And now we make our President spend the first 2 years of his presidency proving he is an American citizen because he doesn't come in a light skinned package. Companies add to their millions by sponsoring reality shows like "Teenage Moms","Mob Wives", "Housewives of Beverly Hills", and "Jersey Shore" but they pull out of "Muslim Nation". I know which group of people I want as neighbors, and if you and I disagree I don't want you as a neighbor either. I mean really, if you choose Snooky over a family that loves each other, contributes to society, and takes care of themselves just because they are Muslim, I truly have no use for you.
"Common sense is the genius of humanity."
~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
I have worked on kindness in my own life. I have allowed people in that I would not have chosen, I have continued to love a family that I can no longer call mine. I have put my own pain aside so that my children will feel and see love. I see kindness in those around me. My mother has never taken more than she gives and never asks for anything. I have friends that do things for others that can make me smile and feel warmth just by knowing how they have spent their day. But our work toward humanity needs to be so much more.
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
A Christmas Prayer
Dear God,
I thank You for the blessings in my life. I ask that You teach me to sing them to the mountain tops so that the grumbles of day to day circumstance may be drowned by its joyful ringing.
I pray for the gift of forgiveness and the ability to forgive so that my heart will rise up to meet each day and each person I meet with a love and kindness that sets afire the chill of anger and regret in its brilliant glow.
I thank You for the gift of my children. I pray that I will teach them to be wise and caring and kind. I pray they will understand that it is what you give in life that makes it full, not what you get. I ask that You give them the keys to their own souls, so that they own them and nourish them with no expectations or desire for someone else to be the force that fuels their dreams. Therefore may all of their relationships be kindred and true, never one sided.
I thank You for my mistakes and hardships. I pray that I will learn from them and use them for change, not dwell on them and use them as excuses.
I thank You for my tender heart, though easily scarred and broken. I pray that I never harden and forget how to feel. Please always remind me that more of my life scars are from a game played hard and well than from a fall or a break, therefore I can never be afraid to jump up and play the game again. If I quit not only will I lose, I will cease to exist.
I thank You for this time of year, for Your gift, for what it says to us all about love and sacrifice. I pray that I will take it out in the world with me and find ways to sacrifice for others. May my life be fueled by the love that I have to give, not that I expect to receive.
Amen
"Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow."
~Melody Beattie
I thank You for the blessings in my life. I ask that You teach me to sing them to the mountain tops so that the grumbles of day to day circumstance may be drowned by its joyful ringing.
I pray for the gift of forgiveness and the ability to forgive so that my heart will rise up to meet each day and each person I meet with a love and kindness that sets afire the chill of anger and regret in its brilliant glow.
I thank You for the gift of my children. I pray that I will teach them to be wise and caring and kind. I pray they will understand that it is what you give in life that makes it full, not what you get. I ask that You give them the keys to their own souls, so that they own them and nourish them with no expectations or desire for someone else to be the force that fuels their dreams. Therefore may all of their relationships be kindred and true, never one sided.
I thank You for my mistakes and hardships. I pray that I will learn from them and use them for change, not dwell on them and use them as excuses.
I thank You for my tender heart, though easily scarred and broken. I pray that I never harden and forget how to feel. Please always remind me that more of my life scars are from a game played hard and well than from a fall or a break, therefore I can never be afraid to jump up and play the game again. If I quit not only will I lose, I will cease to exist.
I thank You for this time of year, for Your gift, for what it says to us all about love and sacrifice. I pray that I will take it out in the world with me and find ways to sacrifice for others. May my life be fueled by the love that I have to give, not that I expect to receive.
Amen
"Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow."
~Melody Beattie
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
All I want for Christmas. . .
"Santa baby, I want a yacht and really that's not a lot."
You know the song, well at least if you listen to the radio anytime between Halloween and Christmas you do. And I hate the song, but I like the list. I mean, who wouldn't right? A diamond, some platinum, a convertible. You can have the fur, I'm not really into furs. Of course then you wake up and your Santa is NOT that guy!
Yet it raises the question, if I were going to ask Santa for my heart's desire what would that really be? Not cars and boats. No, not really. So what? If I stop to think like a responsible, kind, loving citizen of this earth then I'm supposed to ask for world peace and an end to hunger, right? And I want that, I do, but I'm thinking of me at this moment. If you find this selfish and not in the spirit of Christmas you can stop reading now, but this is a me moment.
The problem is I find it hard to make the list. Maybe because I do in fact find some things self indulgent.
I'd like to be financially comfortable enough not to worry anymore. I'd like to know that when the girls are 16 I'll be able to buy them cars. I want to take them to Disney World. So there I said it... if I could ask for WHATEVER I wanted, money would be on the list. Shoot me.
It's also difficult because some of it is so unrealistic I guess. I'd ask for more time. More time for fun things, more time for me, more time for the girls. Time for hobbies even. But then I'd have to ask for a hobby because I have NO idea how to come up with one of those. Trust me, I've tried. Which can lead to another wish. The ability to really look back at my life and figure myself out. To get to know me. Then maybe I would feel like I hadn't wasted so much time. Or if nothing else it would make stepping up and taking control of my life now a little easier. So insight into my own soul, hmmm is that too much to ask?
"Never apologize for showing feeling. When you do so, you apologize for truth."
– Benjamin Disraeli
I'll keep my list to four, but the last one is the hardest. The last one makes me feel like I appear weak. I want to be a strong independent woman, but how can I be needy at the same time? And I am needy. I need someone to understand me, to know me. I need someone to appreciate what I have to give in the only ways that I know how. I don't think Santa can deliver that. I don't know that I would know how to accept it if he did, but I would be willing to try.
This is my "Grown up Christmas List". I'd like to say it's simpler than the song, but to be honest I think the tangible things are easier even if grandiose. I will enjoy what I do get for Christmas and even more what I am allowed to give. I will watch my girls beam with excitement and know that I couldn't really want for much more than that. But in my heart I allow myself some personal desires. I have now shared them with you. I hope it will help someone else know that it's okay to want things too and even to say them out loud. Wanting and being disappointed about not receiving are very different things.
You know the song, well at least if you listen to the radio anytime between Halloween and Christmas you do. And I hate the song, but I like the list. I mean, who wouldn't right? A diamond, some platinum, a convertible. You can have the fur, I'm not really into furs. Of course then you wake up and your Santa is NOT that guy!
Yet it raises the question, if I were going to ask Santa for my heart's desire what would that really be? Not cars and boats. No, not really. So what? If I stop to think like a responsible, kind, loving citizen of this earth then I'm supposed to ask for world peace and an end to hunger, right? And I want that, I do, but I'm thinking of me at this moment. If you find this selfish and not in the spirit of Christmas you can stop reading now, but this is a me moment.
The problem is I find it hard to make the list. Maybe because I do in fact find some things self indulgent.
I'd like to be financially comfortable enough not to worry anymore. I'd like to know that when the girls are 16 I'll be able to buy them cars. I want to take them to Disney World. So there I said it... if I could ask for WHATEVER I wanted, money would be on the list. Shoot me.
It's also difficult because some of it is so unrealistic I guess. I'd ask for more time. More time for fun things, more time for me, more time for the girls. Time for hobbies even. But then I'd have to ask for a hobby because I have NO idea how to come up with one of those. Trust me, I've tried. Which can lead to another wish. The ability to really look back at my life and figure myself out. To get to know me. Then maybe I would feel like I hadn't wasted so much time. Or if nothing else it would make stepping up and taking control of my life now a little easier. So insight into my own soul, hmmm is that too much to ask?
"Never apologize for showing feeling. When you do so, you apologize for truth."
– Benjamin Disraeli
I'll keep my list to four, but the last one is the hardest. The last one makes me feel like I appear weak. I want to be a strong independent woman, but how can I be needy at the same time? And I am needy. I need someone to understand me, to know me. I need someone to appreciate what I have to give in the only ways that I know how. I don't think Santa can deliver that. I don't know that I would know how to accept it if he did, but I would be willing to try.
This is my "Grown up Christmas List". I'd like to say it's simpler than the song, but to be honest I think the tangible things are easier even if grandiose. I will enjoy what I do get for Christmas and even more what I am allowed to give. I will watch my girls beam with excitement and know that I couldn't really want for much more than that. But in my heart I allow myself some personal desires. I have now shared them with you. I hope it will help someone else know that it's okay to want things too and even to say them out loud. Wanting and being disappointed about not receiving are very different things.
Monday, November 21, 2011
"Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn't learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn't learn a little, at least we didn't get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn't die. So, let us all be thankful. ~ the Buddha
Thankfulness, original thought this week right? But it's meant to be the time to remind yourself so I figured I might as well join the crowd. It's been a trying year to say the least. To be honest it's been a trying few years. In early 2009 I lost my job and my dog in the same week and it seems like it was down hill from there for a while. I lost a friendship that I cherished not long after that. And over the past year I've lost my marriage. Yes, trying times.
*In 2010 approximately 1 in 7 households in America didn't have enough to eat.
*More than 16 out of every 100,000 children under the age of 18 in the US were diagnosed with cancer in the year 2005.
*There were 1.6 million homeless people in America in September 2010.
I could pull statistics from the computer all day long, but is it necessary? Sometimes life is hard. Sometimes others' lives are harder. Perspective is always necessary. So yes, I've had a few years of trying times. I've had support through them. I've been loved by my family. I've been clothed, fed, and kept warm. My children are healthy. And these are the basics. There is so much more. I've laughed. . . a lot. I've seen some beautiful sunsets. I felt an earthquake! (I realize some might not find this to be a positive, however the ability to experience nature is an amazing thing!) I've made new friends. I've watched my daughters become smarter and more beautiful daily. I've learned how to deal with adversities that I didn't know I could handle. All days have not been grand, but I have been given all those days! The quote above is simple but true, I didn't die. For this I am thankful. And for so much more. Perspective...I am very thankful for the ability to see life, not just mine but the life around me, and make sense of what is truly good and bad. I do not experience much that is bad compared to many. I will live with trying times and be thankful.
"Some people are always grumbling because roses have thorns; I am thankful that thorns have roses."
~ Alphonse Karr
Thankfulness, original thought this week right? But it's meant to be the time to remind yourself so I figured I might as well join the crowd. It's been a trying year to say the least. To be honest it's been a trying few years. In early 2009 I lost my job and my dog in the same week and it seems like it was down hill from there for a while. I lost a friendship that I cherished not long after that. And over the past year I've lost my marriage. Yes, trying times.
*In 2010 approximately 1 in 7 households in America didn't have enough to eat.
*More than 16 out of every 100,000 children under the age of 18 in the US were diagnosed with cancer in the year 2005.
*There were 1.6 million homeless people in America in September 2010.
I could pull statistics from the computer all day long, but is it necessary? Sometimes life is hard. Sometimes others' lives are harder. Perspective is always necessary. So yes, I've had a few years of trying times. I've had support through them. I've been loved by my family. I've been clothed, fed, and kept warm. My children are healthy. And these are the basics. There is so much more. I've laughed. . . a lot. I've seen some beautiful sunsets. I felt an earthquake! (I realize some might not find this to be a positive, however the ability to experience nature is an amazing thing!) I've made new friends. I've watched my daughters become smarter and more beautiful daily. I've learned how to deal with adversities that I didn't know I could handle. All days have not been grand, but I have been given all those days! The quote above is simple but true, I didn't die. For this I am thankful. And for so much more. Perspective...I am very thankful for the ability to see life, not just mine but the life around me, and make sense of what is truly good and bad. I do not experience much that is bad compared to many. I will live with trying times and be thankful.
"Some people are always grumbling because roses have thorns; I am thankful that thorns have roses."
~ Alphonse Karr
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
I know, I know... it's been a while. Trust me when I tell you I get reminders, OFTEN. It's not that I haven't wanted to write. I've had ideas that fizzled, or chances that I wasted on computer hangman games. I've even just taken turns between staring at my screen saver and the clock when I could have been writing. Obviously focus is a bit of an issue. But today I was thinking that I started this blog with "How I Got Here" so I thought it might be time to address "Where I am".
I cry less often. And in realizing that "not at all" is probably unlikely I find this to be a good thing. By making myself understand that most of my torrential downpours were more from fear, anger, and being overwhelmed than sadness this was easier to take control of than I expected. So one thing down...check.
I exercise more regularly. This is not a huge distinction unfortunately. We are just going to have to call this a baby step with no real promise of giant steps at the moment. I do what I can do. I accept that in myself. I hope you do too. Can I get half a check at least?
The best thing I can say about where I am is where the girls and I are. I'm proud of our routine. We work together, well as much as you can get a 6 and 8 year old to work together. They still bicker a lot, but I am growing more patient. It feels awful to know that you take out your own life issues on your children. I know I'm not the only person that does it, but it still makes me feel bad. I'm getting better. I'm still loud, will always be loud, but I'm having to apologize to them less. I'm glad. The 3 of us are learning together how to deal with what life throws at us. And we are learning not to expect the cookie cutter lives that we expected. They really don't exist and I'm not sure that it's terrible for the girls to figure that out at such a young age. I hate it's taking divorced parents to understand it, but I think they will be better people because they do get that. So kids and I are good. Double check.
My own life is still very much in limbo. This I hate! And much of it is out of my control. Hmmmm, lack of control. THIS I HATE! But I'm learning to let it go some. I'm living in the moment more for now. I have to say for now because I do believe I will reach the point when I have to grab on and regain control, push much harder. But for now, in the limbo state, this is how I keep sanity. I guess this is a wash, no check no minus.
So now we are down to where the minus comes in. I'm still convinced most days that I can't do everything alone. To be honest, I'm doing it. Maybe even better than I did before. I keep all my plates spinning (thanks to a cousin and fellow blogger for that example) but I FEEL like they are all about to drop at any minute. I guess it boils down to not trusting myself or more so not trusting my abilities. Remember when you were a kid? You could do anything and just let someone tell you otherwise! Bulletproof, well I was anyway. And I watch people as they get older, no longer scared to speak their mind, determined not to let anyone help them. Why then, right in the middle of life, when I need that attitude the most am I the least confident? This is, at present, my fail. And it truly isn't my actions, it's only how I feel about it. I want to stand, put my hands in the air, and roar "I am She Ra (remember her?), I can do anything!" But I look at myself and I think I'm a little more Aunt Bee. . "Andy, oh my, what am I going to do? The oven is broken and I have pies to bake." Point being I let silly little things get to me, knock me down, and make me feel alone and inept. But then I do get back up and keep going. I'll keep working on She Ra - the red headed version of course - but until I get there I'll just keep going.
SO. . . a little closer to 40, still overweight, not as close to "legally" single as I would like to be, but still happy and getting better all the time.
I cry less often. And in realizing that "not at all" is probably unlikely I find this to be a good thing. By making myself understand that most of my torrential downpours were more from fear, anger, and being overwhelmed than sadness this was easier to take control of than I expected. So one thing down...check.
I exercise more regularly. This is not a huge distinction unfortunately. We are just going to have to call this a baby step with no real promise of giant steps at the moment. I do what I can do. I accept that in myself. I hope you do too. Can I get half a check at least?
The best thing I can say about where I am is where the girls and I are. I'm proud of our routine. We work together, well as much as you can get a 6 and 8 year old to work together. They still bicker a lot, but I am growing more patient. It feels awful to know that you take out your own life issues on your children. I know I'm not the only person that does it, but it still makes me feel bad. I'm getting better. I'm still loud, will always be loud, but I'm having to apologize to them less. I'm glad. The 3 of us are learning together how to deal with what life throws at us. And we are learning not to expect the cookie cutter lives that we expected. They really don't exist and I'm not sure that it's terrible for the girls to figure that out at such a young age. I hate it's taking divorced parents to understand it, but I think they will be better people because they do get that. So kids and I are good. Double check.
My own life is still very much in limbo. This I hate! And much of it is out of my control. Hmmmm, lack of control. THIS I HATE! But I'm learning to let it go some. I'm living in the moment more for now. I have to say for now because I do believe I will reach the point when I have to grab on and regain control, push much harder. But for now, in the limbo state, this is how I keep sanity. I guess this is a wash, no check no minus.
So now we are down to where the minus comes in. I'm still convinced most days that I can't do everything alone. To be honest, I'm doing it. Maybe even better than I did before. I keep all my plates spinning (thanks to a cousin and fellow blogger for that example) but I FEEL like they are all about to drop at any minute. I guess it boils down to not trusting myself or more so not trusting my abilities. Remember when you were a kid? You could do anything and just let someone tell you otherwise! Bulletproof, well I was anyway. And I watch people as they get older, no longer scared to speak their mind, determined not to let anyone help them. Why then, right in the middle of life, when I need that attitude the most am I the least confident? This is, at present, my fail. And it truly isn't my actions, it's only how I feel about it. I want to stand, put my hands in the air, and roar "I am She Ra (remember her?), I can do anything!" But I look at myself and I think I'm a little more Aunt Bee. . "Andy, oh my, what am I going to do? The oven is broken and I have pies to bake." Point being I let silly little things get to me, knock me down, and make me feel alone and inept. But then I do get back up and keep going. I'll keep working on She Ra - the red headed version of course - but until I get there I'll just keep going.
SO. . . a little closer to 40, still overweight, not as close to "legally" single as I would like to be, but still happy and getting better all the time.
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
What words uplift you?
"Here's what my love affair with quotations has taught me; the more you focus on words that uplift you, the more you embody the idea contained in those words" - Oprah.
When asked what words uplift me I couldn't answer right away. I had to think about it, I also asked others for uplifting words. Here are a couple of my favorites:
“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow.” - unknown
"Be yourself...everyone else is already taken!" - Oscar Wilde
Of course I could spend time searching out my own favorite quotes, but a copy of other's words doesn't seem like much of my own blog. I think I'd rather consider what types of words and sentiment inspire me. Because to be honest, most inspiring words I find come from the most curious of places. Quiet conversations you may not have even been meant to hear. Or listening to someone else's story of a burden that makes you realize that pain can also be encouraging if you listen to what others do to over come it.
So here we are at words uplift me. Words spoken of courage. I really do like the quote above. Understanding that courage doesn't have to be facing the dragon, but being willing to slowly sneak up and feed it, making it your friend, is so much harder and takes much longer. Continuing is courage, not fighting and winning.
Words about liking who you are and LEARNING who you are. I spent many years being told to like myself, but it wasn't until I started to dig and read about how to be a happier person that I began to realize I had to figure out who I was before I could decide I liked who I was. And truly I think it's okay not to like all of it. There are things about me that I don't like and that I can change. That being true I'm sure I have an obligation to myself to do so. I guess I would say that I like words that encourage me to like who I am becoming and that push me to keep becoming. Never stop evolving. I think possibly liking who you are at present too much is a bit of a cop out. It allows you to stop growing.
And I am very often uplifted by people's struggles. Probably more than anything else. A famous person can say something brilliant and profound, but when you live in the limelight and have everything in front of you it's easy to say positive things. I am uplifted by those that have been knocked down over and over and stand up to tell you about it. Not for sympathy but to share how they lived and survived and how they want to help you do the same. Or along the same lines of what I said before about courage, the person who's struggles you hear of just rather matter of factly. Not praise that they even made it through, just the way life is and how they plan to continue to live. So truly, I think I am more inspired by actions than I am words at all. Maya Angelou said "you can tall a lot about a person by the way he/she handles three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights." Sometimes words are just words. Behavior is inspiring.
How I watch someone speak to a child, or pet a dog. How someone speaks to me and when, not what they say. The faithful good morning that I get every morning inspires me to keep going. Watching someone stop to open the door for a women with a baby in a car seat and two in tow, that's inspiring. The person that says hello with a smile to the not so clean man on the street corner, that is inspiring.
I am not saying words don't teach and don't help us get to these places. I just believe how we use these words in everyday life mean so much more.
I can read and research and study. And words about kindness, and learning what contentment should be can help teach me how to live. I appreciate these words being put down on paper. Sometimes I truly need them to remind me of the kind of person I want to be. But to say someone has inspired me it is how they spoke to me, when they noticed that I needed a kind or teaching word, these are the times that I will remember who and what made me try to become the best person I could be. True inspiration comes from our parents, our teacher, preachers, bosses, and friends. Even sometimes just strangers that pass you on the street. I think I am most inspired by these people as I watch the world that is closest around me and can thankfully say that I can still see kindness most everyday.
When asked what words uplift me I couldn't answer right away. I had to think about it, I also asked others for uplifting words. Here are a couple of my favorites:
“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow.” - unknown
"Be yourself...everyone else is already taken!" - Oscar Wilde
Of course I could spend time searching out my own favorite quotes, but a copy of other's words doesn't seem like much of my own blog. I think I'd rather consider what types of words and sentiment inspire me. Because to be honest, most inspiring words I find come from the most curious of places. Quiet conversations you may not have even been meant to hear. Or listening to someone else's story of a burden that makes you realize that pain can also be encouraging if you listen to what others do to over come it.
So here we are at words uplift me. Words spoken of courage. I really do like the quote above. Understanding that courage doesn't have to be facing the dragon, but being willing to slowly sneak up and feed it, making it your friend, is so much harder and takes much longer. Continuing is courage, not fighting and winning.
Words about liking who you are and LEARNING who you are. I spent many years being told to like myself, but it wasn't until I started to dig and read about how to be a happier person that I began to realize I had to figure out who I was before I could decide I liked who I was. And truly I think it's okay not to like all of it. There are things about me that I don't like and that I can change. That being true I'm sure I have an obligation to myself to do so. I guess I would say that I like words that encourage me to like who I am becoming and that push me to keep becoming. Never stop evolving. I think possibly liking who you are at present too much is a bit of a cop out. It allows you to stop growing.
And I am very often uplifted by people's struggles. Probably more than anything else. A famous person can say something brilliant and profound, but when you live in the limelight and have everything in front of you it's easy to say positive things. I am uplifted by those that have been knocked down over and over and stand up to tell you about it. Not for sympathy but to share how they lived and survived and how they want to help you do the same. Or along the same lines of what I said before about courage, the person who's struggles you hear of just rather matter of factly. Not praise that they even made it through, just the way life is and how they plan to continue to live. So truly, I think I am more inspired by actions than I am words at all. Maya Angelou said "you can tall a lot about a person by the way he/she handles three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights." Sometimes words are just words. Behavior is inspiring.
How I watch someone speak to a child, or pet a dog. How someone speaks to me and when, not what they say. The faithful good morning that I get every morning inspires me to keep going. Watching someone stop to open the door for a women with a baby in a car seat and two in tow, that's inspiring. The person that says hello with a smile to the not so clean man on the street corner, that is inspiring.
I am not saying words don't teach and don't help us get to these places. I just believe how we use these words in everyday life mean so much more.
I can read and research and study. And words about kindness, and learning what contentment should be can help teach me how to live. I appreciate these words being put down on paper. Sometimes I truly need them to remind me of the kind of person I want to be. But to say someone has inspired me it is how they spoke to me, when they noticed that I needed a kind or teaching word, these are the times that I will remember who and what made me try to become the best person I could be. True inspiration comes from our parents, our teacher, preachers, bosses, and friends. Even sometimes just strangers that pass you on the street. I think I am most inspired by these people as I watch the world that is closest around me and can thankfully say that I can still see kindness most everyday.
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